THE HONEYMOON APARTMENT?

                       Omen #2       THE HONEYMOON APARTMENT ?

        Mother had prematurely announced to the Ladies Golf Association that Guy and I were getting married.  So now she was getting nervous waiting for our engagement to be confirmed. she worked off her anxiety cleaning out the garage and closets. Daily she would come forward with some treasure that would “look so cute” in our “honeymoon apartment”.  From then on each time Guy rang the doorbell for our date Mother would jump up like Povlo's dog to hand me some family discard for Guy to take to his “honeymoon apartment”.

   To get the full picture here you need to know Mother was always afraid I would go into Guy’s “bachelor pad”, and now she is calling it our “honeymoon apartment”.  My point here is this, I had no intention of living in that gosh awful place and now she is furnishing it.    Guy’s bachelor pad was unkempt at best.  I just happened to peek inside the door one hot summer day to find a Christmas tree skeleton decorated with cigarette butts and flip tabs leaning against the wall in a heap of dry pine needles, there was no furniture in the room and the floor was carpeted with plastic wrap and coat hangers from the cleaners plus dirty socks, etc.  Guy had no need for a burglar alarm because there was nothing to take and an intruder would surly trip in the tangled coat hangers, fall to the floor and suffocate in the plastic wrap before making it past the Christmas tree.  I’m not even going to mention the blue mold in the kitchen sink and the Kentucky Fried Chicken box of peturifed bufflo wings.

   And now Mother was adding to the mix with in-law-hand-me-downs such as a frayed bath mat with matching toilet seat cover, a stack on faded towels that didn’t match, a Fondue dish complete with “”cute little forks”, two well-worn bean bag chairs, souvenir coffee mugs from Mother’s golf tournaments and an old GE toaster that was a wedding gift for Mother and Daddy in 1937.  Our engagement went downhill from there.  All of this was freaking Guy out big time.  I could see the reality of married live coat him with a white paste.

         Stay tuned for Omen #3